Adult-led Play & Child-led Play– Differences, Benefits, Balance

Understanding the differences between adult and child-led play is confusing, especially if you have never experienced them fully. It is great to be curious and consider other options as you transform your lifestyle and accommodate new work schedules and learning experiences for your family.

Adults oversee playful learning experiences like games, activities, and social events during adult-led play, but kids are in control during child-led play. Child-led play is a child-directed experience unaffected by adult motives, responsibilities, or rules.

This post will discuss the differences between adult-led and child-led play and discuss the benefits of each. Child-led play is gaining more attention because of the pandemic, and I understand the confusion. Remember that all different play situations are unique to the setting, motives of the learner, and the facilitator. You will pick up the differences in no time!

Please note: I use parent, teacher, caregiver, and adult interchangeably, so refer to whichever word suits you the most.

What is Adult-led Play?

Adult-led play is when an adult, caregiver, or teacher is in charge of guiding and instructing children through a learning experience. The in-charge caregiver supports the learning in different ways by encouraging the child to listen, follow instructions, repeat steps, and give gentle reminders.

It was advantageous for me to understand these terms when I started my career. Teachers have expectations like assessments, journals, and conferences and must direct play.

Here are examples of people who might practice adult-led play.

• Teachers
• Daycare teachers
• Community center instructors
• Parents
• Babysitters

Adults control the learning experience and are active participants for the duration of the play.

Games, activities, ideas, and concepts get explored through adult-led play for various reasons. Adults typically hold the highest role and are in charge during this playing experience.

Adults and caregivers might want to start a family event and ask for cooperation, so it is fun for everyone and free of distractions.

What Makes an Activity Adult-led?

There are a few key factors at play when considering an adult-led activity. Since a child is not allowed to engage in their usual behaviors or follow their natural interests, adult-led activities may promote rule-following, dialogue and require cooperation –depending on the size of the group, the age of children, and the elements in an activity.

Adult-led activities may require adults to provide the following elements:

• rules
• materials
• assessments
• reflection-based assignments
• cooperation
• emotional processing
• dialogue
• compliance

In child-care settings, the dialogue is based around body parts, shapes, colors, and other relatable words that help them learn the language they need to identify or accomplish a skill. It might be a class circle time game or an outdoor ball game like 4 square.

Adult-led activities with groups of older children may require more compliance if the task contains dangerous elements or requires group cooperation for success. Adults working with older children may focus on the more minor aspects or elements of a task or activity to teach the child to fill the gaps with more steps.

Reasons People Practice Adult-led Play

Reasons that parents and caregivers practice adult-led play are usually because of assessments, safety, large groups of children, and adults wanting children to practice skill-building.

• Group games and activities
• Assessments
• Safety
• Skill-building

During community games, adults will control activities to facilitate learning and collaboration. Large groups may have to follow the rules, so everyone gets a turn with a material, tool, or object. Teachers must consider safety, which requires rules to keep all the children free from harm. They may also need to reinforce boundaries if there are large groups of children. 

Teachers promote rule-following if their goal is to witness the action and help the child understand why they can or can not follow through with the activity. The teacher might want to see a child’s action for documentation like parent conferences or checklists for assessments.

Benefits of Adult-led Play

For many teachers, adult-led play is desirable for the organization of the room because it keeps things tidy and in control. Adult-led play is predictable for childcare providers and allows them to plan particular games and activities with groups of kids.

Kids learn to follow particular rules needed for group games, and they see other people following directions. Because they have to take turns, they may be able to see others practicing skills and problem-solving.

When adults are emotionally present, this experience is excellent for children because they can express strong feelings of self-doubt and worry while a safe person is there to reflect, encourage, and facilitate play with love and clear communication.

Here are more benefits of adult-led play.

• Classroom organization.
• Inclusion.
• Children learn to follow instructions.
• Adults ask questions, repeat, and reflect with children.
• Children learn about the community.
• Kids are exposed to numerous teaching styles.
• More structure.
• Adults must reinforce communication.
• Children witness new learning styles.
• Adults safely guide children.
• Children get to experience more high-risk activities.
• Multiple children can be involved in a game or project.
• Children practice collaborating and problem-solving.
• Groups of children identify group problems during complex tasks.
• Kids learn different skills by watching others.
• Children have a chance to experience intense emotions in a group setting.

Differences Between Adult-led Play & Child-led Play

The caregiver controls the learning experience during adult-led play. Adult-led activities with groups require rule-following and cooperation for successful interactions, but child-led play is different.

Adult-led Play	Child-led Play
Adult rules are enforced.	Kids’ independent activities.
Teachers may have an assessment.	Adults focus attention on the child.
Other people are present (large groups).	Children may lead the adult.
Adults are the leaders and are in charge.	Self-directed play/games.
Safety could be an issue.	Kids make rules for their own games.
It may involve caregivers, teachers, or instructors.	Children stay focused on their goals.

During child-led play, the activity’s direction depends on the child’s interests. Adults listen to the child’s instructions, follow their tasks and requests, and reflect and repeat what they are doing instead of enforcing rules or imposing standards on the child.

Adult-led Activity Examples

Tons of examples come to mind when I think of adult-led play. These could be day-to-day things like teeth-brushing or more group-based scenarios like duck-duck-goose. Even games at family reunions could be adult-led activities. If they are for fun, there is no need to feel stressed unless you assess egg balancing capabilities. 😉

Here is a list of things that could be parent-led activities. For this article, remember that these are just ideas. There are no hard or fast rules– just typical ideas.

What is Child-led Play?

During child-led play, children are in charge of a learning experience; they lead themselves and an adult into an activity or game. Children direct and influence the adult, who must follow the child and stay focused and attentive.

Children follow their own interests and independent learning during child-led play; adults must direct their attention to the child. Kids direct an experience, game, or activity and choose materials and a location that suits them.

Because they follow their motivation, child-led activities often reflect true interests, passions, and language skills. This type of interaction between children and adults teaches children that their interests are of value; they are important. Adults respect children’s innate curiosity and follow their patterns.

Don’t get confused with independent playtime! This is when children play by themselves for long periods, and it’s different from child-led play.

Why are Adults Important in Encouraging Child-led Play?

Children want to feel the power and control of the adult’s actions in child-led play. During this experience, children can feel control over activities or tasks, given they are not in danger.

Many kids are usually towered over and demanded to do many things every day. Giving them the chance to turn the tables allows them to fill different shoes.

When a child prompts an adult, it indicates that the child wants an adult to follow instructions. Adults are helpful during this type of play because they engage with the child but then hand over control –giving them authority over the situation.

When parents or teachers show compliance, it teaches them to value their evolving interests and makes them excited to learn more. Parents and teachers must encourage independent ideas and exploration. Adults do not take over or enforce strict rules during child-led play– unless it is a safety issue.

Parents’ Passive Role in Child-led Play

Parents who ask questions and focus on the child’s lead will naturally take a back seat. They must follow the child’s rules, ask them how to do something, and notice their patterns and skills. It is essential for adults to stay with the child for the duration of the play and to stay interested in what they want to talk about as long as they can.

Adults are critical during child-led play if the goal is to make adults look silly– this promotes laughter! Make sure that you look extra foolish if this is what they want because laughing is healthy for kids and adults. The adult typically imitates the child or character, something scary, or follows the children’s rules.

Reversing roles helps the child feel in charge, which increases self-worth because they experience the adult’s passive behaviors and witness their ideas in action. This is fun for kids because they release tension, fear, and anxiety.

Benefits of Child-led Play

Responsiveness and reciprocity are vital for children’s development; child-led play promotes communication. Children understand that their unique interests and skills matter and witness adults practicing child-led activities, building self-esteem, and promoting dialogue.

Please consider these benefits of child-led play.

Examples of Child-led Play

Instead of group activities, child-led activities look like games that direct the parent. Anything that a child can direct is a child-led game.

Here are some examples of child-led play activities.

• A child who asks to direct sand play will smooth the sand up and down your arm to see if you notice its scratchy texture.
• While playing with trucks, a child will ask a parent to crash the truck into the water to see how it splashes.
• A kid might want to play with a collection of bouncy balls in the hallway; they will ask you to throw the bouncy ball and run away quickly while counting how fast they can collect them.
• A toddler will ask you to point out your nose and ears during a copy-cat game.
• While playing with dolls, a child will ask you to take the clothes on and put the clothes on.
• During baby doll games, a young child will ask you to change the diaper and feed the baby.
• Children will ask you to build specific areas of the train tracks; they will direct how tall and how long to make them and which pieces to use.
• While playing with blankets, children will tell you how they want to build a fort. They will show you the blankets to use and explain how they want to try to keep them up.

A parent might sit down for a block-stacking game and ask the child about their structure. If the child is interested in the adult’s presence, they will likely start talking about their creation. Once the adult is focused on the child’s interests, they will follow the game’s rules.

Kids control the pace, materials, and tools for their games. They are free to select an appropriate area and will tell the parent where they want to go to play. Adults should follow the child’s cues and stay with the child because they are the focal point.

No checking phones! 😉

Adults may support, scaffold, and facilitate but may not direct.

What is the Right Balance Between Child-led and Adult-led Play?

Parents should try child-led play more often because of the benefits it provides. Children feel more autonomous when they can direct play. It’s likely that when children direct play more often, they play better independently because they are confident in their abilities.

However, it is a personal choice to promote child-led over adult-led play and vice versa.

Balancing the two depends on your child’s temperament, the number of children within a group, control issues, and flexibility. Learning to incorporate both into a setting will probably serve you well as you navigate and address different daily problems. Psychologists recommend 15 minutes to an hour of child-directed play per day.

Children need as much time with their parents as possible. While I understand the busy lives of parents, I know that kids want more child-directed fun.

Typically if danger is involved, parents will impose rules and restrictions. Groups of people will want to create boundaries for children to stay safe and have an enjoyable experience. If you are at a family picnic playing egg toss, you may want to decide whether it is worth the hassle.

If you are in a school setting and a group of children wants to learn to play flag football, it might be advantageous to enforce specific rules for the children to follow.

Parents cannot play more because they are overworked, stressed, tired, and overwhelmed with responsibilities. Playing may help with adult stressors if they can put chores on hold. Adults will benefit from child-led play because they will laugh and spend time with their children.

Child-led play is a more relaxed and fun learning state and works better for children with developmental or social issues. It is a helpful experience for socially challenged children to experience because they do not feel the stress involved during the adult-led scenarios.

Final Words

Adult-led play involves caregivers, teachers, or parents directing the play, and it is usually done with large groups of children. People practice adult-led play for reasons concerning assessments or for safety reasons. Child-led play is a child-directed experience involving a child and an adult. There are some differences between the two, and it becomes more apparent once exposed to these different play types regularly.

Sources

• Child-led play & activities: 0-6 years | Raising Children Network
• Child Directed Play (seattlechildrens.org)
• Microsoft Word – articleParent_led_play (lianalowenstein.com)
• Playful Parenting by Lawrence J. Cohen, PhD
• Temperaments– children, what they are, importance – Mission Momplex
• What is Adult-Led play? – Answered – Twinkl Teaching Wiki
• What is Adult-Led Play? – Mission Momplex
• What Is Independent Playtime? – Mission Momplex